Looking Back and Looking forward
I was recently asked to speak at a workshop about looking back and looking forward.
I chose the phrase – Full Circle to describe the year so far.
Pregnancy Loss
To me, Full Circle meant a closing of the circle, for instance I was coming back to myself and meeting me again twenty years later.
Twenty years ago, I had a stillbirth at 24 weeks.
It was traumatic, harrowing, and unbelievable that such a thing could happen.
I dug deep and got through it in the only way I knew how.
I craved change and started down a new career path, retraining as an Aromatherapist at the Tisserand Institute. This led me into a world of self-discovery and self development. It opened up my mind to lots of new ways of living and being.
Self Discovery and Healing
I discovered energy healing, I discovered the unconscious mind runs 95% of our programming and most of that came from the ages of 0-7 yrs old. I also discovered healing groups and healing which helped me move forward to a stronger place and most of all I discovered that by helping others, it helped me to come to a place of meaning.
Rainbow Baby
I was fortunate to fall pregnant again 3 years after my loss and brought my rainbow baby into the world.
She was sheer delight and pleasure and I poured all my love into her.
We decided to try for baby no 2, sadly I miscarried at 8 weeks, naturally, at home.
Because I had experienced healing and self development I was able to move on quite quickly.
We tried again, and daughter no 2 was born. For the last few years I have dedicated my time and energy to bringing up two lovely girls which took my focus away from my pregnancy loss.
Finding Meaning from my Loss
Now the girls are older and more independent, I have focussed on my business, helping other women through their loss.
Over the past twenty years I have learnt many healing modalities and I always dreamt of sharing them. At the beginning of this year, I decided to write a book.
Coming Full Circle – Birthing a Book
I started writing in March this year, and finished in September – the book has been published and is ready to go to print next week! To that end, I feel I have come full-circle. I’ve dug deep, and examined the unhappy times and some wonderful times which got me through.
It is my hope that this book reaches the many women who have carried, loved and lost babies in pregnancy.
It’ll enable them to get through this dark, sad, lonely and isolating time. No one knows what you’re going through even though you put on a brave face for the world.
If you have lost a baby in pregnancy, a miscarriage or a stillbirth and would like to help yourself heal or knows someone who has, you can pre-order my book here….https://jotocher.com/the-book/
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